Somebody pinch me! No, wait, I’m afraid a simple pinch will not do. I think you had better tie me upside down, strip me naked, hose me down, slap me upside the head, hire a gaggle of barrel chested Herculean-like body builders, all armed with aluminum Louisville Slugger baseball bats, and just unleash them to flail away wildly and pummel my skull and throbbing torso with all the gusto they can muster.
By Ted Nugent
As you see, it will probably take such extreme physical therapy to simply gain my attention, for I am gone with the wind, intoxicated, blasted, drunk, obliterated, schnookered, wasted, zonked, out of my backstrap overdosed feeble mind, zombie’d if you will, hell, totally zombie’d even if you don’t, for I am Ted Nugent, The WhackMaster, StrapAssassin1, high as a kite again on the mystical flight of the arrow and a tsunami of nostril flaring tarsal gland stink and backstraps galore, all bleary eyed and drooling with joy as I wallow in the ever increasing madness of THE RUT 2015!
Whew! Shouldn’t I be tired by now? You see, I started living in trees with my trusty Mathews NoCam bow and quiver full of pumpstation seeking carbon projectiles sometime in early September, and by my crazed guitar-player/bowhunter calculations, I have spent somewhere near 400 elevated ambush hours so far this season, and with 99% of those hours sitting patiently, waiting, waiting, waiting, and waiting, even at a basic measly $10 an hour meat gathering wage, my average backstrap meal rounds out to about $327 a pound.
Can you imagine if I added up the cost of supplies, fuel, hunting ground, nick-nacks, taxes, licenses, fuel, feed and assorted expenses! I would bet the value of a backstrap lunch would scare the bejezuz out of anybody and everybody.
But not me or my Spirit BloodBrothers!
And did I mention how emphatically we are convinced it is SO worth it!
Lord have mercy, this has been a fascinating bowhunting season so far, and I love, no, I crave every soul stirring, mind numbing glorious minute of it, even when I get skunked. Which will come in very handy since I am almost always skunked!
It has been a crazy slow season so far but for sure ultra-crazy FUN!
I’ve celebrated some mighty fine arrows on some mighty fine Texas and Michigan whitetails, including a few stunning stag beasts with massive headbone.
But the ultimate celebration continues to be this amazing social media phenomenon as a way to share the celebration of the hunt and the lifestyle to 10s of MILLIONS of people around the world.
A small intimate campfire is always wonderful, but a humongous global campfire is even better!
That is correct. My Facebook and Twitter maneuvers include anywhere from 4-5 million upwards of 33 MILLION people that I get to communicate with on a daily basis. More often than not it is more like on an hourly basis, and I wish to say THANKYOU right here at deeranddeerhunting.com to everyone everywhere for all the positive spirit, positive energy, gungho enthusiasm, goodwill, decency and shared truth, logic and commonsense about hunting, wildlife, freedom and venison.
When I emphasize the simple truth that every hunt includes 100% FUN, SPORT, TROPHY and MEAT, I can hear the wheels turning around the world that the dishonest propaganda can be obliterated in a moment’s time by simply sharing my lifetime of hands-on, boots on the ground, 1st person hunting truth!
When someone who has never hunted before chimes in how they support hunting for food but not for sport, I inform them that it is impossible to hunt without sport.
Every hunt is quintessential sport due to the incredible challenges of archery, marksmanship, woods skills, ambushing strategies and outsmarting the miraculous evasive capabilities of game animals.
Occasionally someone will ask if we actually eat the venison, and of course once I express how we cherish such hard earned, sacred, healthy protein for our families, the truth sinks in immediately.
Some have expressed their criticism of “trophy hunters” until I explain that every kill is a meaningful trophy, and die-hard “trophy” trophy hunters actually provide the best benefit to a healthy herd by taking out the oldest males, thereby making room for upcoming younger males.
Some have even expressed how they can’t understand how it could possibly be fun to take an animal’s life until I relate how the fun part is the ongoing preparation, training, practice, gear organizing, strategizing, wildground exploring, campfires, family and friend gatherings, and ultimately a job well done by cleanly killing the surplus animals that will feed our family.
It is impossible to hunt without having incredible amounts of FUN!
So here’s wishing all you Natty Bumpo BloodBrothers out there in this outrageously exciting time of the building rut to celebrate every hunt for the supreme FUN, SPORT, MEAT and TROPHY excitement that each hunt provides, well, at least each successful kill provides.
Celebrate like you mean it for this is the only November 2015 we will ever get a shot at. This is it! Make it the best ever. May the backstrap gods me with you!
Ted Nugent is an award-winning musician and writer, with numerous best-seller books including “Ted, White and Blue: The Nugent Manifesto,” “God, Guns and Rock ‘n Roll,” and “Kill It and Grill It: A Guide to Preparing and Cooking Wild Game and Fish” with his wife, Shemane, among other books. Be sure to check out his website for more news on his latest music, thoughts and upcoming shows, and also at World News Daily, Newsmax and Daily Caller for more insights.
Stay Safe and Hunt Longer This Season!
Are you familiar with the safety precautions that need to be put in place in order to ensure proper tree stand placement and usage? If the answer is “no,” or you feel like you need to brush up on your tree stand safety skills, then the Tree Stand Safety Resource Kit is for you. Containing three prime resources regarding tree stand safety, this collection will ensure you’re well on your way to avoiding as much danger as possible while installing, climbing or descending from, or using a tree stand. Begin with Treestand Safety and Placement, and learn the proper method for hanging a stand. You’ll also get placement advice for the best hunting.