Woodswalker-- Just for you

[shaman]

While Scooter and the rest of the team were correlating the data from today's experiments regarding the DST change and deer activity, I started puttering around the house, getting ready for season.

Woodsie and the rest of y'all know about the sewage situation here; we have nothing more than a poop pipe that runs out into a pasture. The last 100 feet is 4 inch corrugated and once every few months I go down to the end and move it 20 yards this way or that on the hillside. I went to move the end of the pipe today and . . .


. . . there was no pile at the end. Usually it accumulates a good foot high or so. There's usually about a bushel basket of compost at the end, but this was dry. It also meant there had been nothing coming down the pipe at least since I moved it last at the end of turkey season.

I had Angus flush up at the house. Nothing. I moved up the hill and had him flush again. Nothing. I pulled the 4 inch corrugated off the end of the clay tile and repeated. Nothing.

I rushed in the house, opened up the trapdoor in the bathroom and looked, fearing the worst. Nothing. The ground under the house was fairly dry.

About a year ago last summer, I remember hearing a loud rushing noise coming from the back yard. Angus and I found a small hole in the grass that sounded like that was the loudest. Sure enough, the clay pipe had separated and there was a little hole clear to the sod line. I put a rock over the hole and decided that if it were a problem, we'd see the effects soon enough. Now, a year later, I can't find the rock or the hole.

I have this vision of walking to the Thoughtful Spot some night in the moonlight, mid-Season. I will be stiff and sore from a hard day of hunting. I will be tired. I will be wandering back to the fire with my little beaker of Scotch and all of a sudden I'll wonder why the sky is receding from me so quickly. I will come to in a cavernous sinkhole that has formed just behind the Utility Shed. Two years of sewage will be at the bottom. I will cry for help, but no one will hear me.

[Woods Walker]

Shaman....Here's your problem, you're too close to the situation! The answer is obvious. Due to the DST change, the sewerage in your pipe has encountered a time warp. This is no ordinary time warp though, this is Bermuda Triangle grade time warp. Somewhere, someday, someone will encounter a tremendous pile of "rare earth" that wasn't there before. If they carbon date it (now THAT conjures up a very unpleasant image!! ) they will be even more amazed to discover that this pile, while appearing to be "just out of the oven" in a manner of speaking, is actually many, many years old. Just think of it...your poop will be the stuff of legends, and stories will be told around the campfire for generations to come.

Bet you never thought you'd achieve immortality in this fashion!!!!

BTW....what have your poor dogs been doing for entertainment since the pipe stopped flowing?

[kellory]

"BTW....what have your poor dogs been doing for entertainment since the pipe stopped flowing?" That's easy...chasing the old man up and down the pipe...

[shaman]

And they say I'm full of it, because I write about the effects of DST on deer!

Dang!

An old hunting buddy of mine ( one of the originals, Big Bob) called me up last night. He's having the same problem at his house. He lives out in the burbs an hooks into a city sewer. He started noticing trouble a while back, and called in the plumber. They put dye in the john, but no dye showed up at the street. He's got a 130 ft run.

My guess is that every sewer in the Midwest is going to be like this. The ground dried really badly during the summer's draught. Now we're starting to get rain and its causing the ground to heave deep down-- just in time for deer season!

Me? In another month, I can just forget about it until spring. Who knows, by then the pipes will have aligned back up and I'll have it flowing again.