Don’t get me wrong: I wish I could have saved this blog post for April Fool’s, but it’s too good. It’s real a doozy. Best of all: It’s rooted in a real-life breaking news story that you would not expect to be reading in 2022.
First, the news: Virginia lawmakers announce — thank goodness — they have repealed the archaic “Blue Law” that forbad state residents from hunting on public lands on Sundays. With this new legislation, deer hunters (and all hunters for that matter) can climb treestands, sit in ground blind and, well, hunt to their collective heart’s content on public lands on Sundays.
You Can’t Do This in Virginia
That’s great news for hunters, but before everyone gets carried away, be warned that there’s still plenty of laws on the books to make up for this concession. According to Virginia law firm Kearney, Freeman, Fogarty & Josh, PLLC, it is technically illegal to do any of the following in the Old Dominion state:
- Use profane, indecent, or threatening language on the phone. This includes the language you use in your text messages.
- Tickle a woman. Men, however, may be tickled.
- Have sex with the lights on.
- Have sex outside of marriage. This is punishable as a Class 4 misdemeanor.
Other Crazy Laws in Virginia
Additionally, different counties and municipalities have their own strange laws. For example, it is illegal to flip a coin to decide who pays for coffee in Richmond.
What’s more, for decades, it was illegal to hunt on Sundays. The law was gradually changed in 2014 when limited opportunities for Sunday hunting were allowed on some private lands. Well, today is a landmark day for Virginians. Because, with the passing and ratification of Senate Bill 8, hunters will now be allowed to hunt on public land seven days a week during hunting season.
We are not making this up. Virginia was still one of those antiquated states where you could not hunt any game on Sundays. Well, with the exception of raccoons. Previously, if you wanted to hunt and shoot a raccoon on Sundays, you had to do it before 2 a.m.
No doubt, a collective applause is in order for Virigina lawmakers. However, not all state residents are out of the woods, or into the woods, so to speak. It is still illegal to hunt on Sundays within 200 yards of a place of worship.
Know Hunting in Virginia … and Other Stuff
It’s just a gut feeling, but I think Virginians don’t abide by the premise of separation of church and state. That being said, I find it ironic — or should I say comedic? — that you can’t sit quietly and bowhunt within 200 yards of a church on Sunday, but you could, theoretically, watch a football game, buy (and presumably drink) beer, and have sex.
Just make sure you’ve got your marriage license handy … and turn off the lights.